Chapter 18 The Second Looking

Margaret came back in the summer of the cutting, and she did not come with the car that was not built for the lane, but on the bus that ran from Carra to the valley, and she stood in the yard with the dust on her feet and looked at the house the way she had looked at it the year before, and Niamh opened the door and did not say the words, because the words were not needed, and the words had been the keeping, and the keeping had been the thing, and the thing had been kept, and Margaret came into the kitchen of Gort with the dust on her feet and stood at the far end of the boards and looked at the table, and the table had stood in the kitchen of Gort with the leaves in and the grain running to the sea, and the new letter was in the end grain, and Margaret saw the new letter, and she did not ask who the letter was for, because the asking was not the looking, and the looking was the thing, and the thing was kept, and she stood at the far end of the boards with her hand on the grain and felt the new letter under her hand, the way she had felt the closed-eye knot the year before, and she said, It is not just a family now, and Niamh said, No, it is not, and Margaret said, It is the town, and Niamh said, It is the town, and the words had been the keeping, and the keeping had been the thi ng, and the thing had been kept, and the count had gone on in the end grain, one letter after another, patient and unhurried, the way the family had always gone on, one generation after another, around the one long thing the house had not replaced, and the lamp had been lit, and the blue cups had been at the place, and the chipped one had been at its pair, and the tin had been in the drawer, and the money of the roof had been in the tin, and the roof had been over the table, and the table had been in the kitchen of Gort, and the kitchen of Gort had been on the hill, and the hill had been over the valley, and the valley had been over the sea, and the sea had been at the far end of the boards, and the far end of the boards had been the keeping, and the keeping had been the thing, and the thing had been kept. Margaret wrote the second looking, and the second looking was not for the magazine, and the second looking was for the table, and the second looking said the thing the first looking had not said, which was that the keeping was not the family keeping the table, but the table keeping the family, and the family keeping the town, and the town keeping the table, and the keeping going on, one generation after another, around the one long thing the house had not replaced, and the grain running on to the far end where the chair stood empty, and the light reaching the chair and going no further, because that was how far the grain ran, and that was how far the keeping reached, which was to the end of the boards, and no further, and no less, and the second looking had been the keeping, and the keeping had been the thing, and the thing had been kept, and the count had gone on in the end grain, patient and unhurried, the way the family had always gone on, one generation after another, around the one long thing the house had not replaced, and the lamp had been lit, and the blue cups had been at the place, and the chipped one had been at its pair, and the tin had been in the drawer, and the money of the roof had been in the tin, and the roof had been over the table, and the table had been in the kitchen of Gort, and the keeping had been the thing, and the thing had been kept. The second looking said the thing about the table being the town, and the town being the table, and the family being the keeping, and the keeping being the thing, and the thing being kept, and the count going on in the end grain, one letter after another, patient and unhurried, the way the family had always gone on, one generation after another, around the one long thing the house had not replaced, and the grain running on to the far end where the chair stood empty, and the light reaching the chair and going no further, because that was how far the grain ran, and that was how far the keeping reached, which was to the end of the boards, and no further, and no less, and the second looking had been the keeping, and the keeping had been the thing, and the thing had been kept, and the count had gone on in the end grain, patient and unhurried, and the half-letter held the name that had never been finished, and the chipped cup was at its pair on the shelf above the range, and the tin was in the drawer, and the money of the roof was in the tin, and the money of the roof goes to the lane, and the lane goes over the hill to the house of Gort, and the house of Gort holds the table, and the table holds the count, and the count holds the family, and the family goes on, which is what families do, and what the town does, and what the table does, and what the keeping does, which is to say, it goes on, patient and unhurried, finding its own way, like a river seen from a hill, running to the sea at the far end of the table where the chair stands empty and the grain runs on.